Hum drum

Things are kinda the same old same old.  Going ok, even well in some ways, but I’m neither elated or depressed.  And yes, it is midnight and I should be asleep.  But the INFJ version of a little mad scientist has gotten going in my head and Mission Impossible is on at full volume downstairs – not  at all an ambiance for trying to sleep.

Thanks to my friend Nina, I have discovered the joys of drybrushing.  If I do it regularly….I think I can afford to keep that Rx of diuretic in the deep dark corner of my medicine shelf for if something in my body suddenly goes wrong again.  Seriously, since I started dry brushing a week ago…I’ve not had to take a diuretic.  Even better…the tiny bit of edema that simply would NOT go away, has gone away.  Ohh yeah, I’m vainly enjoying my 21yr old ankles looking 21 again!  Still have this funny puffy spot in the inside right below my knees, don’t know if it some strange new fat pad or if it water retention remaining, but I’m faithfully rubbing  Burbur onto it immediately after I dry brush.  Otherwise, my knees look cute again too. 🙂

I have had this strange sinus/ear/and now eye infection for 3 weeks now.  The sx go and then return, including the annoying cough!!  10 days of abx, now 7 days of silver.  This is beginning to sound like the 12 Days of Christmas!  And a nettle leaf tea!  Anyway, I can’t do silver tonight or immediately when I get up…I only have 3 drops left which I plan to use in my eyes, if I can get my “aim” right!  The abx made me herx some, but the silver is very on/off.  I’ll have a good then a bad day herx-wise.  I was hoping the silver would deal with my head, and not in the loopy way…and I also hoped it wouldn’t make me herx all the mysterious bugs in my body.  In vain.  For dealing with this strange head thing…It helps the sx, some will disappear for a day but then come back. Grrrr.  It’s the little junk that gets on my nerves.  We can all buck up to nasty severe stuff after being an emotional wreck for a day or two…we suck it up, get determined and get where ever we have to be to make things change.  Then we get all moany about the small stuff. LOL.  It’s badass, and bitchy.

On Monday I felt ok – I was actually productive on Monday! That evening we went to the AWESOME Ron Paul speech at NCSU.  What an event.  It’s amazing how perky I look, and yes…a picture with Ron Paul is pretty close to perfection.  I think that I look pretty good thanks to the glutathione IV’s and then keeping up on the NAC and finding ways to detox.  I got home from the event, I was both exhausted and keyed.  Didn’t sleep that night, about 5am got this vague headache…always the nausea headache that I can never recognize as such until I begin wimpering/groaning and my whole abdomen feels way toxic as I begin wretching.  Tried to use the bathroom around 11 am after a shallow sleep, and suddenly went from groaning to wretching hard over the tub too from the headache, but nothing came up.  I got splotchy in my hands, tingly and tremory all over which stopped the wretching.  Still had the headache.  Took activated charcoal as soon as I got back to my room, and arsenicum album later which helped the headache.

I was hoping to start Viniyoga this week.  But that seems to be out of the picture until next week.  I have the stuff to do it now, will be working specifically on my shoulders, upper back and neck.  They have improved some, thanks to a good chiropractor(who I really wish lived here), homeopathic pain injections, and ACT, but I still have a lot of big problems, and the structure needs work.  I’m really eager to get going, and am due for either another chiropractic appt or another massage.

Eh, the little mad scientist is running around in my head thinking of all these super cool things, and the kid in me is excited about other good things, and then part of me is like…”the two of you, sit down and shut up!”   When I have mental energy like this…I should put it into accomplishing my to-do list.  Or http://www.tada-list.com rather!  I love that site.  Darn..i forgot to call a certain person today. oh well…I do have tomorrow, Lord willing.  Trying to make arrangements for the summer.  I feel crazy for even trying at the moment.

Yes, my finances are still tight, actually ….  only about $250 total at this point, with nothing coming in.   I’m being straight up about it. Thankfully I’m more stable and so I’m not freaking out.  But you buy a few supplements or see a massage therapist, and poof, that’s gone.  So if you do feel moved to donate, my Paypal is knittingbag@yahoo.com .  You can send it as a “gift.”  I REALLY deeply appreciate the donations that have been given, they have helped me afford the unexpected new pile of supplements.  I thought I already owned everything I could possibly need.  But no…, LOL.  I see more and more though, God DOES always provide a way – he won’t let us do without any good thing!  We just have to trust what He calls “good.”

Sweet dreams.

Apps, Hopes and SwagBucks

I’ve applied for some local jobs.  Please pray that if I can’t go to Ga for the summer, that I will be able to get a job that WON’T make me sicker.  I’ve put three “Don’t apply if” things on my list:  1) it is a foodservice, 2) I will be forced into any kind of olfactory onslaught, 3) the lighting and set up of the location is not easy on my body during a normal length of time in the store.  If I can’t handle 30-90 minutes in any certain store without having symptoms flare then there is no way I can consider working there.  Obviously the environment would make me sicker. It is amazing how much this list of 3 don’ts takes away.  No restaurants, no walmart or similar locations, and no clothing/perfume type store.  This leaves very few options at all.  Still I have applied to 5 places…am hoping to turn in the 6th application today, and pick up apps for 2 more places.

I absolutely have to earn some money if I want to do anything.  I’ve come up with a budget idea for how to use any money I earn.  My plan is that 50% of my total income will go into long term savings for the larger Lyme purchases, like a hyperbaric chamber, a rife machine, a sauna, perhaps a BioMat.  Heck I also need to consider saving for a CAR….which comes first???  Such a challenge.  And I am bound and determined never to rely on the government, whose job it IS NOT to provide.  Some will say I’m just making things harder on myself.  So be it, I won’t be a slave to the government by accepting their “benefits.”  I do believe God will bless me for this resolution and staying fast to it.

Thankfully having had some decent sleep for close to 2 weeks, I feel sane enough to make some decisions for myself.  As long as I can sleep well, I can manage as long as it takes to get the resources to go to Ga and get all the way better.   When one is sleep deprived as I had been for 5 weeks, one’s judgement become quite impaired, and feels sooooo extraordinarily lost and desperate.  Frankly, I feel embarassed for how desperate I had become…I can only hope that those who heard my desperate pleas can understand.  The determination of “I WILL NOT GIVE UP”, the refusal to give up hope, is the essence of those pleas; and I hope that this is obvious to those who heard it as well.

This Thursday I get to go up to Appomattox to visit my best friend of 5 years, Jessica.  I will be spending a week there.  Oh what fun!!!  Spending some time with the her talking about normal life things (hopefully not too much Lyme!!!), hanging out at Baine’s coffee and bookstore getting some book reading done and listening to some folks who only think they can sing, playing my flute and her playing the piano and likely cracking up when we make mistakes.  I’ll likely get to drink some lovely raw juices that Jess’s mom makes, takes some walks in the woods and in downtown, hanging out with the homeschool academy and so on.  🙂  And spending one day with my other friend there…Desi.  So I’m very happy about this upcoming vacation.  I just have to be good and refuse to eat sweets —  how is that anywhere near easy when these folks are like 75% ITALIAN??? — and not drink any coffee.  If I can just be good then I likely will get better while I’m there, not sicker.

I’ve been basically staying on protocol.  I can’t remember exactly how to stagger the doses of what I’m on, and have bene bad about writing in my daily med/sx journal.  Very bad about that.  LOL.  So I think it’s gotten a little shifted by a day or two.  That’s okay isn’t it?  I wasn’t expecting it and neither was the Lyme.  Perhaps it’s good in the long run.  Also, having fillings put in some ancient cavities yesterday kind of makes things feel off kilter.  I had a slight reaction to the lidocaine: the numbing lasted from 2:40pm till 6:00 pm solid… (the dentist was expecting it to be semi wearing off by the time he was done with me, about 45 minutes after numbing me?) and  I felt shaky inside when I was standing or when I was trying to concentrate on anything.  My hand had a mild-moderate obvious tremor for about 2 hours.  Last night I had a brain headache…not sure if that was related or not, as I haven’t had one quite like that in several months.  I’m just happy to have half my teeth fixed–and it’s resin not mercury being used, so I’m happy about that!  LOL, we’ll get the next side done in a week or two.  Let’s hope the lidocaine won’t do anything more than it did yesterday.

On to SwagBucks!  I’ve started using swagbucks for my normal would-be-google internet searches, and I’m earning SwagBucks every day.  I’m currently making about 100 SB a week…and in one month I can earn enough SB to trade in for a $5 Amazon gift card.  There a bunch of stuff you can buy using SB, but I liek the Amazon gift card the most!   I buy books and supplements from amazon.com as they sometimes have the lowest prices.  🙂  So hey!!! that makes me happy.  If you are interested in doing SwagBucks searches it would help me out alot and cost you nothing if you were to get started by using my referral link:  http://www.swagbucks.com/refer/KcSmith I think I’m an official swaggernaut now, LOL!!!

I want to do some nice organizing in my room.  I have an old chiropractor’s table that I want to get put up there since the rolly thingy feels SOOOO good!!!  Also want to make myself a nice hempshake for lunch.  YUM.